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| "Mint Green Calls" by JoyHey, on Flickr |
The word of the LORD came to Jonah a second time, saying, Get up, go to Nineveh, that great city, and proclaim to it the message that I tell you. So Jonah set out and went to Nineveh, according to the word of the LORD. Now Nineveh was an exceedingly large city, a three days' walk across. Jonah began to go into the city, going a day's walk. And he cried out, "Forty days more, and Nineveh shall be overthrown!" And the people of Nineveh believed God; they proclaimed a fast, and everyone, great and small, put on sackcloth. When God saw what they did, how they turned from their evil ways, God changed his mind about the calamity that he had said he would bring upon them; and he did not do it.
Mark 1:14–20
Now after John was arrested, Jesus came to Galilee, proclaiming the good news of God, and saying, "The time is fulfilled, and the kingdom of God has come near, repent, and believe in the good news." As Jesus passed along the Sea of Galilee, he saw Simon and his brother Andrew casting a net into the sea — for they were fishermen. And Jesus said to them, "Follow me and I will make you fish for people." And immediately they left their nets and followed him. As he went a little farther, he saw James son of Zebedee and his brother John, who were in their boat mending the nets. Immediately he called them; and they left their father Zebedee in the boat with the hired men, and followed him.
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Tim sat across the table from me, sipping his coffee slowly as I talked in one, big, run-on sentence about this new opportunity that God had laid before me, to leave the familiarity of the Chicago suburbs, to leave my family, to leave a church that I had served for nearly four years, to pack up everything and move to Iowa and take a call at this pretty fabulous church called "First Lutheran."
Tim was my last hope. A fellow pastor, a dear friend, someone I trusted to speak truth into any situation. I'd made all of pro and con lists. I'd wrestled in prayer. I'd talked to Matt, my parents, my sisters...I'd even gone so far as to talk to friends who had lived in Iowa - and survived! And I was stuck. Ahead of me, the possibility of a REALLY. GREAT. THING. Behind me, the fear of saying goodbye and the guilt over leaving my family and the anxiety of having to pack and move and find a house and change my license plates.
My inner Jonah was winning the battle. "Ninevah is a big city, God, and there's good work to be done there, but I'm pretty sure that it's going to be a rough go of things for me, and so maybe I should think about doing something closer to home."
"I think it's a fantastic opportunity," I said to Tim, "and on paper, it's exactly what I think I am being called to. But saying 'yes' would mean giving up too much. It's too hard to actually do it."
I thought that my decision had been made.
Tim took another sip of his coffee and looked back at me. "Is this a church that you feel called to serve?" Yes. "And do you feel excited when you think about all of the new possibilities there?" Yes. "And you keep saying yes when they ask you for interviews, because you can't bring yourself to say no?" Yes... "But you don't want to accept the call because it would be...hard to leave?" Yes...
Jesus walked along the Sea of Galilee. He called out to Simon and Andrew and they dropped everything and followed him. James and John were in the boat with their father, and Jesus called out to them, too, and they jumped out of the boat and left their father and left behind everything and followed Jesus.
I looked at Tim. I wanted to say, “I hate you,” but instead I said, “I guess I know what I need to do.” And I walked out to my car and called my husband at work. “ I think we're moving to Iowa..."
(Sidenote, in case you hadn't figured it out: God knows what he's doing. And Tim knows what he's doing. And there is no question that my call here was a call from God. I love this place and am lucky to serve here.)
Today's gospel is one of a few different times that Jesus tells people that following him means giving up. Later, Jesus sends out the disciples into the villages, telling them to bring nothing for their journey. And in another episode, a few would-be disciples tell Jesus that they want to follow him, but only after they take care of various important tasks at home, and Jesus tells them that following him means being willing to give up mother and father and home and even life itself. And in another place, Jesus tells his disciples that "If any want to become my followers, let them deny themselves, take up their cross, and follow me.”
For the disciples, the call to follow Jesus meant keeping their eyes open for Christ's work in the world - healing, teaching, compassion, forgiveness. Following Jesus mean that they, too, were challenged to show forgiveness and to enact healing and to welcome children and widows and lepers and sinners and the unclean.
It might sound sort of obvious, but following Jesus means that we, too, are called to these same tasks.
For most of us, we are pretty okay with the idea that God loves us, and that Christ died for us, and that God's grace covers us and forgives us, and that we are lovely, beloved children of God. But our faith gets stretched in different directions when we remember that our relationship with God also comes with a calling. Many callings, actually.
Sometimes, he calls us to do something different - to change careers or to take up a new volunteer project, or to talk to different people or to take a risk on acting with justice or compassion when we otherwise might just have kept our mouths shut. Sometimes, he calls us to be something different - to be more patient or hospitable or gracious or generous, to turn our hearts away from our own desires and priorities in order to focus on the needs of others.
And whenever Jesus calls us to live out God’s hopes and dreams in the world, he calls us to say “yes” to God and “no” to something else. Saying “yes” to God’s values means saying “no” to our own pride. Saying “yes” to generosity means saying “no” to selfishness. Saying “yes” to God’s power working in us means saying “no” to our own illusions of control.
Sometimes we hear God's call and respond like Jonah, kicking and screaming and defiantly waiting until God throws us in the belly of a fish, just to prove that he’s serious. Sometimes we hear God's call and respond like Peter and Andrew and James and John, dropping everything and immediately taking up our new charge.
I love that word “immediately.” Not only does it evoke an image of James and John throwing themselves over the side of the boat and running in slow motion through the water to get to Jesus, but it also gives us a little shove forward in our own walk with Jesus. Because living out God’s call is an immediate thing. There are opportunities to live as Christ’s chosen ones right here, right now.
So that is the question before us right now - as individuals and as a congregation: Right here, right now, what is Christ calling us to do or to be?
Think about that for a moment. What is God calling you toward in this very moment in your life?
As you think about this calling, what is your gut reaction? To run away like Jonah? To jump at the opportunity like the disciples? Something in-between?
What is it that is standing in the way of you saying “yes” to this call? What do you have to give up?
Figuring out and answering God's calling is hard work. As you wrestle with God's call for you, by all means seek out friends and trusted advisors. Make lists of pros and cons. Write out your thoughts, crunch the numbers, drink some strong coffee, think deeply, and pray. All of this stuff is the work of discernment: the ongoing process of listening for Jesus' voice and then trying to answer and obey it.
Friends, I don't know what you're going through right now, and I don't know the exact ways in which Jesus is saying to you, "Drop everything and follow me." But I do know that I can pray for you as you work things through.
I invite you to pull out that yellow Connection Card from your bulletin, and in the prayer request box, to share a little or a lot about what God is calling you to, that we might lift you up in prayer. Maybe it's a word or two, keeping things cryptic. Maybe it's a paragraph. It's up to you.
Take a few minutes between now and the offering to think deeply about where God is leading you. Write down some areas that we can lift you up in prayer. By all means check the box for "I would like to talk to a pastor" if you want to talk some things through.
And remember, in everything that God is calling you to do and to be, that in Christ, God has already said “no” to death and “yes” to life. God has already said “no” to sin and “yes” to forgiveness. God has said “no” to all of your fears and insecurities, and has said “yes” to loving you. All of you. He has said “yes” to empowering you to live like Christ and to live for Christ.
I close with a prayer from the Sisters of Notre Dame, a pray for discernment and inspiration. May it be the prayer on your lips and mine, as we seek this day and always to hear and answer God’s callings in our lives.
Let us pray.
Walk with me, good and loving God, as I journey through life.
May I take Your hand and be led by Your Holy Spirit.
Fill me, inspire me, free me to respond generously to Your call.
For I believe You desire my deepest joy,
And it is only in Your company
That my soul will be satisfied
And my life will find its meaning and purpose.
Amen.
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